I don't know about everyone else, but when I began looking for my future spouse I had a list. My list contained all of my hopes and dreams, my "wouldn't it be great if" desires, and my basic needs in a future spouse. I went about the whole process assuming I knew exactly what I needed. Then I entered into reality, and reality opened my eyes to see that I didn't really know what I needed. God alone knew my actual needs.For me, the beginning stages of entering a healthy relationship with my wife was the necessary surrender of my list. I had to admit that I really didn't know what I needed in the end, and the only way I was going to enjoy what I actually needed was to ask God to show me what He thought I needed. What's interesting is to me is that God's absolute best for me (my wife) did not match many of the bullet points I had on my list, yet she is an exact fit for my needs which also turns out to be exactly what I want. My relationship with my amazing wife shows me that I need to be careful when I assume my list is the right list for my life.